Anna M. Stratulat

“Sometimes, we sabotage our relationships because what we really want is to find ourselves, though we are afraid to be alone. Sometimes, we sabotage our professional success because what we really want is to create art, even if it will make us seem less ambitious by society’s measures.

Sometimes, we sabotage our healing journey by psycho-analyzing our feelings, because doing so ensures we avoid actually experiencing them. Sometimes, we sabotage our self-talk because if we believed in ourselves, we’d feel free to get back out in the world and take risks, and that would leave us vulnerable.

In the end, self-sabotage is very often just a maladaptive coping mechanism, a way we give ourselves what we need without having to actually address what that need is. But like any coping mechanism, it is just that — a way to cope.

It’s not an answer, it’s not a solution, and it does not ever truly solve the problem. We are merely numbing our de-sires, and giving ourselves a little taste of temporary relief…”